PLANNING for a new baby is joyful. The anticipation of the new arrival is exciting for the parents as they buy baby clothes, paint the nursery and look ahead to a life together as a close family.

For some parents, however, that sense of warm anticipation can be devastated when their baby is stillborn.

Thankfully, there is help and support for such bereaved parents in south Essex, thanks to one mum who decided to turn her own grief into something positive.

Michelle Reading was just 18 when her son, Tyler Jake, was stillborn at 25 weeks.

She and her partner, Andrew Waters, were thrilled to find out she was expecting, but just a few weeks before the tragedy, Michelle was told there was a lack of amniotic fluid in the womb, which protects the unborn baby.

Doctors warned the couple the baby may not survive, but they decided to hope for the best.

Michelle had regular scans at Southend Hospital to check the baby, but on October 8, 2003, she woke in pain and was rushed to hospital.

But the midwife could find no heartbeat and Tyler Jake was delivered stillborn.

Michelle, 25, said: “I didn’t cope at all. It was a terrible time.”

Before Tyler Jake was conceived Michelle had suffered a miscarriage at ten weeks, and a year after Tyler Jakes’s death she had another miscarriage at 13 weeks. Happily their son Connor arrived safely in 2006.

Connor, now three, also has a brother, Bradley, 19 months.

Michelle has now set up Tyler Jake’s Angel Nursery, a website offering support to people dealing with their grief of a miscarriage, stillbirth, ectopic pregnancy or cot death.

She said: “Setting up the organisation is something I wanted to do since it happened, but I didn’t really have the strength for quite a while.

“I finally set up the website last year, and many women get in touch online, mostly by e-mail to talk.

“By doing it online it’s less of a big step. They know they can say what they want about how they are feeling and not be judged.

“The main idea is to offer support to other parents and get people talking to each other. Some come to the website ten or 20 years after they lost their little one, for others it’s more immediate. We can all support each other.

“I feel really blessed to have my two boys, and am proud to have the organisation up and running in Tyler Jake’s memory.”

Michelle, of Tyrell Drive, Southend, has held remembrance events, and has fundraisers to cover the running costs of the website, but she also aims to raise money to improve hospital bereavement rooms.

They also spend money on special gifts for the grieving parents in the rooms.

These gifts include cameras to take photographs of their babies, plus teddies and blankets, baby clothes, special Angel certificates and story books.

She said: “I just want to make the rooms more pleasant and personal.

“I want to start in Southend and go all over the country helping to fund improvments.

“The website has visitors from the whole country, so I want to benefit people across the country.”

The plan is to eventually become a registered charity.

There are also plans in the pipeline for a sponsored walk along Southend seafront in June, and a party at the Sutton Arms pub in July.

For now, Michelle is focusing on raising money and being a listening ear to other parents.

To visit the website, go to angelnurserynation.com